I thought I’d put up a slightly different kind of post and get at a pet peeve of mine from back in the days when I was single. (i.e. only a year and a half ago) The big question is, outside of Church, where does a single Mormon go to socialize? The problem is, of course, that Church culture orients our socializing around Church activities. But if you are cursed to be in a ward where you “don’t enjoy the company” or they don’t have good activities, where do you go? Further, Church activities are primarily focused around a kind of extension of the youth programs that seem fine until you hit about 22 or 23 when they start seeming immature or boring.
Here’s the problem. Non-Mormon have the advantage of all sorts of social places to go – most oriented around bar-hopping or related activities. Perhaps its the inebriation, but it tends to be easy to meet people, get invited to parties, and so forth. Those of you outside of the Utah area know what I mean. And outside of Utah there is always that tension of “do I hang with my non-member friends or do I do a Mormon-only socialization.” That is a hard choice, but the point I want to get at is that even within Utah with its thousands or tens of thousands of singles, it is hard to socialize.
Recently the advent of online services have changed that somewhat. Nearly every single person I know is on LDSSingles. Back when I was single I did it a bit, but honestly didn’t like the experience. I’ve dated people I’ve met online, even people from various mailing lists. (Obviously this was from the pre-blogging days) However I usually screwed things up as that kind of cold-shock dating just lends itself to misunderstandings and problems for a whole slew of reasons I won’t get into. Further I know lots of women who’ve had problems with such services due to “creepy” people or even married men looking for affairs. (Lying about it through their teeth obviously)
Back when I was single, I met a lot of people through sports, whether it be climbing, kayaking, skiing or so forth. But while I dated a few people met directly or indirectly thorough that, it often never quite works that way – if only because (frankly) a lot of women don’t get into sports of that sort.
Now I know there are a lot of singles out there. So I thought I’d throw the question out for discussion. (Especially since some think T&S is getting too academic in theme) Where do you go to meet people? Especially in a more laid back and casual way as opposed to that “leap right in” avenue of online services. I honestly can’t figure out why there aren’t “hang outs” that are the Mormon equivalent of bar hopping. You’d think in a place like Provo there’d be a ton. But surprisingly there are more Mormon standards kind of hang-outs in non-Mormon cities than in Provo. In fact Provo has a dismal night life.