Because I said something that might possibly have been interpreted as mildly irreverent , my husband rather dramatically took two steps away from me. I glowered at him until he threw his arms around me and said, “don’t smite her!”
Then he got pensive and said, “How come Lot didn’t stand up for his wife? Didn’t even pray for her? She turns into a pillar of salt and his reaction is pretty much ‘eh, what are you going to do?'”
“He would have done better if she’d been alive. Because she would have said, ‘stop drinking and put a tunic on!”
Earlier, we had our family home evening (really chosen people have it on Sundays, don’t you know?), and the eleven-year-old is really perplexed that Jesus was Jewish. And the four-year-old is really into the idea that Jesus put mud on the guy’s eyes.
There is still a shoe on our roof.
Earlier yet, the seven-year-old had his first bite of sloppy joe and said, “my compliments to the chef!”
And the four-year-old refused to go to Primary. And the eleven-year-old was terminally bored in sacrament meeting.
 It was “stupid Doctrine and Covenants,” a comment brought about by the embarrassment that my husband and I suffered when we insisted to our eleven-year-old on the way home from church that, despite what his teacher told him, there was no such thing in the scriptures about the Lord sending maggots to people and causing their eyes to fall out in the last days and his triumph in quickly looking up D & 29:18-19. Amazing what kids glom onto and adults don’t even remember, isn’t it?