What the Smith Boys Said This Year

In 2005, Simon turned seven, Nathan turned four, and Truman turned one.

Smith Boys

January 8th: Truman giggled.

January 12th
Nathan: “You can’t leave us here alone. That’s onlegal.”
Julie: “I wasn’t going to and I think you mean ‘illegal.'”
Nathan: “No, Mommy. The word is ‘onlegal.'”

January 15th
Nathan: “I’m allergic to snow.”

January 26th
Julie: “This book is about Joan of Arc.”
Nathan: “Isn’t she the one that got fired?”

Julie: “Truman is stinky.”
Nathan: “To me, he doth not stink.”

February 6th
Nathan: “You’re the best mommy I’ve ever had!”

February 11th
Nathan: “Last day when we went to Chik-fil-a, why did you give Truman ketchup?”
Julie: “Oh, it was just an experiment.”
Nathan: “Truman’s not for experiments!”

February 17th: Truman started reaching out to grab things.

February 28th
Nathan: “One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, eleventeen, fourteen.”

March 5th
Nathan: “Mom, can we do that thing where you hold me down and give me a million kisses?”

March 13th
Nathan: “I don’t want to go to church! I already know about Jesus! Why do we have to keep going over and over again?”

March 21st: Truman found his feet.

April 6th
Nathan, mad at Simon for interrupting his computer game: “You’re making me lose my focus!”

April 17th
By way of introduction of her lesson on Adam and Eve, Nathan’s teacher reviewed the creation of the earth and said, “But there was one very important thing missing!” Nathan blurted out, “Toys!”

May 20th: Truman got his first tooth.

May 23rd
Nathan, summarizing life: “So you grow up, then you’re a grown up for a long time, then you turn into an old lady or an old man and then–bam!–you’re dead.”

May 24th
Nathan, to a child who thought Truman was a girl: “It’s not a baby sister! It doesn’t have any ribbons on it!â€?

May 27th
Nathan, to a group of moms at the playground: “Excuse me! Excuse me! I’m sorry to interrupt but there’s a zombie on the playground.”

June 21st
Simon, reading out loud from his history book, “‘The Spanish and English planted colonies’ . . .but don’t ask me where they got colony seeds because I have no idea.”

July 11th
Nathan, on hearing that Julie was going shopping at Toys R Us for his birthday, “Mom, get me one of everything!”

August 31st
Last week in a store, some stickers slipped into the stroller and were accidentally taken home. When Julie realized what had happened, she returned them to the store.
Nathan, not quietly, while walking out of another store: “Mommy, you didn’t accidentally steal anything this time, did you?”

September 14th
Simon and Nathan continue to play Webster and the Three Evil Dentists. They (along with their friend Alex) are the three evil dentists who torment poor Webster in every way possible, including offering him what appears to be chocolate but is actually brussel sprouts.
Simon: “Webster’s dad has worked for five years at a company that writes equations but he only just now learned what 1 + 1 is!”

September 17th
Simon tries to explain inflation to Nathan.
Nathan: “Yeah, even infinity was smaller back then.”

September 20th
Simon tells Julie that, of the live band he heard, the girl playing the tangerine was his favorite.

October 1st
Nathan: “Mom, Cooper had his eyes open during the prayer . . . and I only know that because I read his mind.”

October 5th
Julie: “Do you want your sandwich cut up?”
Nathan: “Yes! Into hexagons!”

October 6th
In an effort to put physical affection into a context that appeals to her tough guys, Julie invents the wildly successful Kissing Cyclops.

October 7th
Nathan: “Mom, if the Earth really is spinning, why aren’t I dizzy?”

October 10th: Truman took his first steps.
Nathan, in a prayer: “And please bless us that we won’t step on the carpet because we are pretending that it is lava.”

October 14th
Nathan: “What’s the true meaning of Halloween?”

October 15th
Nathan: “It’s a good thing we have a Nathan. They can be very helpful sometimes.”

October 29th
The boys took all of their Halloween candy out of the packages and put it into the wrong wrappers in order to trick The Evil King of Evil Things.

November 6th
Nathan, not wanting his substitute teacher in his Primary class at Church to know his secret identity, asked her to call him “Unknown.”

November 15th
Nathan, after a particularly good birthday party: “And please bless us that it can be Ryan’s birthday every day.”

November 24th
Nathan: “I have a big mouth and I know how to use it.”

You sure do, Nathan.

15 comments for “What the Smith Boys Said This Year

  1. December 20, 2005 at 6:56 pm

    When God wants a great work done in the world or a great wrong righted, he goes about it in a very unusual way. He doesn’t stir up his earthquakes or send forth his thunderbolts. Instead, he has a helpless baby born, perhaps in a simple home and of some obscure mother. And then God puts the idea into the mother’s heart, and she puts it into the baby’s mind. And then God waits. The greatest force in the world are not the earthquakes and the thunderbolts. The greatest forces in the world are babies. (Insert: Mommies). -E. T. Sullivan (with revision by Ryan)

  2. Chad Too
    December 20, 2005 at 6:57 pm

    Oh, the number of times I’ve felt like March 13th! Yet, I’m there every week, just like Nathan.
    Nathan can sit by me during Sacrament Meeting any old time.
    Thank you for this glimpse into your family.

  3. December 20, 2005 at 7:00 pm

    Your children . . . . wow! I would be having fits of giggles all the time. Thank you for sharing the Smith boys with us (me!). What active imaginations they have . . .

  4. Kaimi Wenger
    December 20, 2005 at 7:00 pm

    Great post, Julie. We have to have a kid party some time. I think that your Nathan would get along very well with Kace, who is well known for his loud mouth and great comments.

    Also, Indigo would love having more boys to follow around and try to make pay attention to her. One very recent (yesterday) Indigo conversation:

    (She comes out of her room, wearing half a dozen brightly colored bracelets).
    “Dad, how do I look?”
    “You look beautiful, Indigo.”
    (Turns to Mardell with a triumphant smile)
    “Dad said I look prettier than you!”

  5. December 20, 2005 at 7:00 pm

    It’s hard to pick a favorite, but the one about lava just cracks me up!

  6. harpingheather
    December 20, 2005 at 7:09 pm

    So cute and funny! Thank you for sharing. ^_^

  7. December 20, 2005 at 8:58 pm

    October 1st reminds me of when my son suddenly blurted out, while we were all watching tv in the living room, “Nobody smell anything!”

  8. December 20, 2005 at 11:38 pm

    “November 6th
    Nathan, not wanting his substitute teacher in his Primary class at Church to know his secret identity, asked her to call him “Unknown.â€?”
    I keep re-reading this and cracking up. Great post.

  9. Kristine Haglund Harris
    December 21, 2005 at 9:35 am

    Julie–these are great; thanks for posting them! Our funniest ones lately involve my illiterate children trying to spell: Louisa: “Mom, how do you you spell ‘chother’? I already wrote “Love” and “e”.” Sam (a couple of days later): “Mom, what’s a “nager”? You know, like a tea nager?”

  10. Geoff B
    December 21, 2005 at 11:17 am

    Julie, I really enjoyed these. Thanks for sharing them. Kids provide endless entertainment if you just pay attention.

  11. WillF
    December 21, 2005 at 12:04 pm

    The “eyes open during the prayer” line was clever. I assume he started reading minds after having received this familiar retort on a previous occasion: “how do you know my eyes were open, were your eyes open? huh?”

  12. Sara R
    December 21, 2005 at 2:33 pm


    Thanks for this idea. I stole your idea two years ago and my family has loved our Christmas newsletters ever since. Our most recent one:

    Sara (mom) is making Laura (age 7) promise something.
    Sara: Raise your right hand. Say, “I swear…”
    Laura: (horrified) No!
    Sara: Okay, say, “I promise…”
    Laura: I promise not to swear!

  13. Ana
    December 21, 2005 at 2:58 pm

    Julie, your kids rock!

    We have been laughing lately about 6yo Sam’s insistence that his dad is getting a “Pf.D.” What do you think that stands for?

  14. john scherer
    December 21, 2005 at 3:16 pm

    Thanks for the laugh! Your boys sound very intelligent. One of my favorite’s from my flock was given by my then 3YO Matthew when his mother was experimenting with a new dish.

    Dinner Blessing:
    Dear Heavenly Father,
    Thank You for this (Pause) Food.
    Please bless it to stay in our bodies…………..

    Either a kidly variation of sustain or a lack of confidence in mom’s culinary skills. :)

  15. Kevin Barney
    December 22, 2005 at 11:23 am

    Absolutely precious, Julie.

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