Author: Dane Laverty

The Mormon Twitternacle

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After years of ignoring/making fun of it, I’ve finally gotten into Twitter. It lets me keep up with the people that I’m not close enough to to friend on Facebook. It also has cool feeds for things I’m interested in, but wouldn’t follow otherwise (like the new MESSENGER probe to Mercury and Cassini on Saturn. I love getting updates from our exploratory spacecraft! ). Once I got into it, I started looking for my bloggernacle friends and idols. I discovered (a) that it’s not easy to find people on Twitter, and (b) that in spite of the great Mormon blog presence, I’m not seeing a Mormon Twitter presence. So I’m putting this post up as a “bloggernacle Twitter directory”. If you have a Twitter account and you want to let people know about it, put it in the comments below.

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Sharing the Gospel with Human Beings

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(These are the notes for the talk I gave in sacrament yesterday.) Amanda When I returned from my mission in Japan, I was fired up about sharing the gospel. I wanted to be an effective member missionary. Back then, us missionaries had these big blue sheets of paper that we would use to plan our weeks. One side had a weekly schedule — Sunday, Monday, Tuesday… The other side had spaces for keeping track of the people you were teaching. On that side of the blue planner, you would keep a record of your progress in teaching each person — which lessons you had taught, whether they had attended church, that sort of thing. I mention these blue planners, because, like I said, when I got home from my mission I wanted to continue sharing the gospel, and I decided it would be a good idea to keep using these blue planners. So each Sunday night I would get together with my brother and sister (who were 10 and 12 years old at the time) and we’d hold these little mission meetings, where we’d talk about people we’d met that week and how we could share the gospel with them. Then we’d keep track of their names on the blue planners, set goals, and head off to share the gospel. At this time I had a friend at UC Davis. We enjoyed attending cultural events at the university together. One…

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Measures of Excellence, Gospel Hobbies, and Civilization 3

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A “measure of excellence” is a metric of comparison. Measures of excellence are what we use to say that one person is “better” than another. Money is another measure of excellence. In fact, beauty (for women) and money (for men) are the two historically dominant measures of excellence (at least, that’s the case in the history we tell each other today). In ancient times (1991, that is) there was a popular computer game called Civilization. You, the player, guided a civilization from 4000 BC to AD 2020. In the game there were two paths to victory. The first was to destroy all of the other civilizations and become the ruler of the world. This is a typical victory condition in gaming — defeat all your opponents and you win. The second path to victory was to be the first civilization to build a spaceship and colonize another planet. This was pretty innovative — in the combat-dominated gaming ecosystem of the day, Civilization provided the player with a peaceful, “enlightened” alternative. To stretch this into a metaphor about feminism and measures of excellence, the “enlightened” alternative feminine measure of excellence is traditionally intelligence. This advancement allowed smart girls to feel some of the smug superiority that beautiful girls had been enjoying and exploiting for millenia. Now you’ve got a three-faction game where the smart girls could call the beautiful ones shallow, the beautiful girls could continue to ignore the smart ones,…

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Two Quick Comments

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One: A “biblically-based cratering theory”? Aaaaauuuugh!! Two: The phrase “biblically based”. Whenever I meet a person who’s part of a new Christian church (now that I think about it, it’s kind of funny that this happens often enough for me to talk about it), they say that their church is unique because it’s “based on the teachings of the bible” — you know, as opposed to all of those other Christian churches out there, which are apparently using some other set of scriptures. Snark aside, I’m not aware of any mainstream Christian churches that don’t claim to be biblically based, so I’m not sure that calling your church “biblically based” really distinguishes you in any way. That’s all.

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“It’s been scientifically proven…”

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I remember an argument I had with an acquaintance in high school. I don’t remember the topic anymore (capital punishment? abortion? gay marriage? I’m sure it must have been one of those perennial high school kid debates). A friend had recently told me something that bolstered my side of the argument. I knew the information was correct, because he told me that “it had been scientifically proven.” So I went confidently into the argument, and when the climax came I pulled out my trump card with a, “And it’s a scientifically proven fact!” Yet somehow my opponent failed to see the genius of my argument, responding with, “Yeah? Show me.” Suddenly I was left empty handed and defeated. I’d based my whole argument on my friend’s claim and never sought to understand it myself. Fortunately, however, the debate woke the spark of critical inquiry in me. I learned that authority is useless unless founded on substance. The church equivalent of “it’s been scientifically proven” is “the prophets/scriptures say”. The scriptures say a lot of things, and the combined Journal of Discourses and archive of conference addresses say a lot more. “The scriptures say” is often shorthand for “my seminary teacher told me”. It can also mean, “I’m so confident that what I’m saying is true that I’m sure the scriptures validate it. I may not be able to point at a specific verse or anything, but I’m sure it’s in…

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Why Do We Need So Many Gods?

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The idea of a godhead fascinates me. If a god is omnipotent, then why do we need three of them (or more, depending on your interpretation)? Here’s my entirely-speculative take on it. (Now including advice on how to raise your kids, too! I know, I know, it’s hard to find people who are willing to offer unsolicited parenting advice. You can thank me later.) One of the hardest parts of being a parent is figuring out when to be strict and when to be lenient. When your child throws a temper tantrum over something trivial, do you snuggle him and say, “I bet you’re tired and hungry. Here, let me make you some soup and read you a story,” or do you say, “This is unacceptable behavior,” and put him in time out? Kids need both, but we can only do one of them at a time. Over time, our kids develop an expectation of how each parent is likely to react in a given situation. Impressions aren’t especially nuanced, so kids tend to paint their parents with broad strokes, e.g. “My mom is so strict”, even if the mom is in fact pretty even-handed, but tends to err on the side of caution over permissiveness. But what if you were a perfect parent? What if you knew exactly when to indulge and when to challenge? The sad truth is that it wouldn’t matter much. The child would still develop…

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Are the Arts Selfish?

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In a previous ward, a high council speaker told the congregation that pursuing a degree in the arts is a selfish decision, and he counseled the youth and young adults to pursue a useful, financially secure discipline instead. My recollection is that is point was that an artist can’t provide a spouse and children with a decent, stable lifestyle. I’d love to hear from those of you who majored in the arts, and from those who wanted to major in the arts but ultimately decided not to. In retrospect, how do you feel about your choice?

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Moral Authority

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A friend of mine posted this on Facebook a few days ago: Morality is doing what is right regardless of what you are told. Religion is doing what you are told regardless of what is right. It’s a great bumper-sticker quote — short, emotionally charged, and completely one-sided. Usually I see these, chuckle, and move on, but this is one that my mind keeps coming back to, to chew on some more. What does the church do well? How does the church justify its own existence? (As an aside, if your answer to this question is, “The church doesn’t need to justify itself through helping people be happy here on earth. The blessings of obedience to the church are waiting for us in heaven,” then please feel free to ignore this post entirely. All I can say is that reserve the right to judge my church by its fruits.) No organization is great at everything. That’s why we have governments, schools, markets, churches, and the hundreds of other institutions that form our society. Each provides a distinct service better than any of the others. Governments are not schools, and schools are not churches. So what are churches? And more specifically, what is the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints; what distinctive service does it provide to society? Here are my observations on things the church does well: Social and emotional support network The church creates unity. It meets needs…

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Correlation and Computers

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Here are two lines of computer code: int myNumber; myNumber = someOtherNumber + 3; If you’re not familiar with programming, the first line says, “Here is an integer (int) called ‘myNumber’.” The second line says, “Set the value of myNumber to someOtherNumber plus 3.” So what if I want to know the value of myNumber? I’ve got two options. Either I can tell the program to display the value, like this: out.print(myNumber); or I can look back through the code to find the value of someOtherNumber and mentally add 3 to it: int someOtherNumber = 8; So now I know that myNumber is 11. —– My point is, how do we interpret unclear statements in scripture? BCC’s Friday Firestorm this week gives a great example of why this matters. Is D&C 82:7 despair inducing, or is it motivating? It depends on what “unto that soul who sinneth shall the former sins return” means. out.print(untoThatSoulWhoSinnethShallTheFormerSinsReturn); That approach isn’t an option, unless the Lord stops by to explain for us. So instead we search through the scriptures, prophetic utterances, and whatever other materials we feel will help us understand how the value of untoThatSoulWhoSinnethShallTheFormerSinsReturn was set. I think this is why books like Mormon Doctrine gain so much traction — they purport to provide universal value definitions for complicated scriptural terms. As a missionary, I loved the Missionary Guide for the same reason. I recall one line in it that stated, “Righteousness…

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Wab, Hm-Ntr, and Hm-Ka

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A couple years ago I was reading up on Egyptian hieroglyphics just for fun. Okay, so it was just one book, and I’m in no way qualified to write anything about hieroglyphics, but I’m not going to let that stop me! :) The book I was studying from identified three different Egyptian words for priest: wab, hm-ntr, and hm-ka. They kind of translate to pure-person, god-person, and spirit-person, respectively. The book didn’t go into any detail about the relative roles of the three, but the names got my imagination rolling. In modern America, I suppose that our archetypal image of a priest is some combination of these — a pure person who communicates with God and has an understanding of the spiritual nature of things. However, I think that in particular belief systems, one of these aspects is usually dominant over the others. In non-evangelical Protestant Christianity, it seems that the priest is closest to the “wab”, or pure-person. He is a pastor, an upstanding, moral individual who guides his flock with encouragement and example. He’s not necessarily personally acquanted with God or the spirit world, like the hm-ntr and hm-ka, but he does study about these things from the scriptures and tries to relay them to his congregation. The Restoration movement, both within the LDS church and in other “spiritual gifts” movements, like Quakerism and Pentacostalism, claimed that man could, in fact, know God for himself. The hm-ntr-style priests…

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Ward Diversity Specialist

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I’ve been thinking about Papa D’s recent post about responding to subtle racism in the church. How about creating a “ward diversity specialist” calling? Points in favor of a ward diversity specialist: Every calling in the ward has a natural nemesis–except for the ward preparedness specialist. You know, like the natural enmity between elders quorum president and ward clerk, or between the Relief Society president and the high priests group leader. The diversity specialist would provide a natural foil to the ward preparedness specialist. Problem solved. Two-thirds of the 3-fold mission have corresponding obnoxious specialist callings that no one listens to. This would complete the missing third! It gets lonely waiting around to ring the class bell. A ward diversity specialist could provide friendship to the second counselor in the Sunday school presidency while he waits to perform the duties of his calling. It’s a perfect fit for the ostracized ward liberal. To be fair, I guess I should consider the cons: This is a calling whose role is to prevent people from offending other people. Unfortunately, the calling’s very existence is liable to offend a sizable portion of the ward right from the start. The ward preparedness specialist has the advantage of cool object lessons. In comparison to earthquake simulations, first-aid triage, and knot-tying techniques, the ward diversity specialist’s lectures on effective forms of interfaith participation will be lacking in dazzle. Do we really need another “specialist” calling? So…

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Claiming the Promised Land

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I went walking today, in the hills between Rocklin and Lincoln: I spent hours out there. It’s been a long time since I just made off into the hills like that, to spend a whole afternoon there with no concern about needing to get back for work or some other obligation. I’m looking for a word. As a kid, my friends and I spent our afternoons and weekends walking through the hills at the edges of our neighborhood in Cameron Park. We called it “exploring”, but it after the dozenth (or hundredth) time it’s hard to justify that name — since you know all the trails, the rocks, the trees, you’re not really “exploring” anymore. Other words — “hiking”, “adventuring” — also don’t feel right. Hiking implies something more strenuous — a journey, a start and a finish. We weren’t hiking so much as just wandering. We had named the tree groves and boulder formations after the cities from our favorite Nintendo games (Dragon Warrior and Final Fantasy 2), and so we’d just go out there and make-believe ourselves to be the heroes from those stories as we traveled from city to city, fighting the bad guys (which mostly consisted of smashing tree branches with our sticks. The oak trees’ outer branches dry out nicely in the summer, and they shatter in gratifying showers of twigs.) “Hiking” sounds too outdoorsy, too boy-scouty. Our exploring wasn’t so much about that. It…

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The Bloggernacle in a New Decade

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To me, ldsblogs.org is the bloggernacle. When I have a spare minute, I usually head over there to see what’s new at FPR, FMH, Keepa, The Exponent, or any of my other favorite Mormon blog spots. I know a lot of your names, and though I haven’t met any of my fellow bloggernaclers in person, I feel comfortable here with you. It’s that comfortableness that got me thinking about how the bloggernacle has grown and developed, and what it’s future trajectory is. I’m comfortable here because I know the people here, and whenever I get comfortable I have to ask, “Is growth still happening?” As far as I can tell, the bloggernacle serves five great purposes: Social connections for church members who don’t feel connected to the members in their own branch or ward (and even for the members who do feel connected locally). Amazing articles that offer quality insights on interesting gospel topics that aren’t often discussed in church. A place where alternative-yet-faithful voices in the church can express themselves in a safe and supportive environment. Shared trials, where church members going through hard times can help and be helped by others with similar experiences. Laughs :) So how are we doing? Are we still seeing new names and faces here? Or have we matured as a community, with the next generation of Mormon bloggers moving elsewhere to start their own bloggernacle? What keeps you coming, and, incidentally, how…

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Book of Mormon (Politically Correct?) Stories

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I was recently called to teach the 10 & 11 year olds in Primary. They’re a great class — smart kids and good energy. It’s been a long time since I’ve had the opportunity to enjoy listening to (and singing) the Primary songs. Last week we sang every kid’s favorite Primary standby, “Book of Mormon Stories” (well, it’s either that, “Popcorn Popping”, or “The Oxcart”…I think we sang “The Oxcart” as our opening song for every FHE for eight years straight). Everyone was doing the hand motions, but when we got to, “are about the Lamanites in ancient history,” I noticed that only about half the teachers and students did the old “Indian feathers” two fingers behind the head. Now, I know that there are plenty of good reasons not to do the feathers, and I expect they’ll be culturally phased out in the next decade or so, so I was wondering if this change is a local or global phenomenon. Any other Primary teachers out there ready to investigate and report the status of “Indian feathers” hand signs in your local Primaries? Any suggestions on a hand motion that could be used to replace them?

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Improptu

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It’s approaching a year since I started writing here at Times & Seasons, back on January 20th. That, combined with Christmas, house hunting, and the inexorable New Year, has me reflective. Where am I going, and how am I doing in getting thither? I started my stint here writing about building Zion — specifically, how we can intentionally build communities that bring people together in ways that are rewarding for each member of the community. I wrote about communities and Zion through April, and thought that would be my ongoing theme. That hasn’t turned out to be the case. Since April, my writing has been approximately equally divided between posts on gender roles, complaints on specific church-related issues, and discussing my little theo-philosophical models. Not bad, but not remarkable. In a sense, I suppose those topics are the bloggernacle in a nutshell. My life has paralleled that pattern. I’m a passionate dreamer. I love being involved in the arts and creative projects. I had always planned to live a simple life, one of thought, reflection, friendship, and few personal possessions. I’m inspired by sunrises, foggy evening, windswept hills, and starry nights; by Thoreau, Whitman (not Meg), John Dowland, and George Winston. I’m a good choreographer and composer, a passable dancer and musician. And somehow, in spite of that, I’ve come to a place where I’ve got an MBA and lots of student debt. I’m looking at purchasing a suburban home…

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Dreams

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I’ve got dreams on my mind today. Years ago, while perusing the History of the Church books, I was surprised to discover an account of a strange dream from Joseph Smith (via Wilford Woodruff). I find it fascinating and I’ve never heard anyone refer to it, so I share it here: “I was standing on a peninsula, in the midst of a vast body of water, where there appeared to be a large harbour or pier built out for boats to come into. I was surrounded by my friends, and while looking at this harbour I saw a steamboat approaching the harbour. There were bridges on the pier for persons to cross, and there came up a wind and drove the steamboat under one of the bridges and upset it. “I ran up to the boat, expecting the persons would all drown; and wishing to do something to assist them, I put my hand against the side of the boat, and with one surge I shoved it under the bridge and righted it up, and then told them to take care of themselves. But it was not long before I saw them starting out into the channel or main body of the water again. “The storms were raging and the waters rough. I said to my friends that if they did not understand the signs of the times and the spirit of prophecy, they would be apt to be lost.…

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Transhuman

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Why is the concept of holiness so closely related to self-denial? This isn’t just a Mormon thing, or even a Christian one. We see it in the Buddhist monastic tradition, the yogis of India, and the shamans of many cultures. The holiest people are the ones who can undergo the longest tests of endurance. Most of us are more familiar with what holiness isn’t than what it is. For us, the essence of holiness is “not me”. I would guess that this is the reason we associate “holiness” with the ability to endure trials — we expect to find holiness in something greater, stronger, or more powerful than ourselves. When we find a person who demonstrates great longsuffering, we don’t understand that person, but we instinctively revere her or him. I think that this instinctive divide between “me” and “holy” is the root of the professional clergy class. From ancient times, the priests or shamans of a society have set themselves apart with distinctive dress, habits, forms of communication, and associations. Intentional or not, these clergy obtain power by becoming “not me” or “not human”. They become unrelatable transhumans, and it is by virtue of their unrelatableness and transhumanity that we revere them. Much has been made of how Joseph Smith’s work blurs, or even erases, the line between the mundane and the divine. One great example of this is in our system of rotating lay clergy. Bishop Clark was…

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Jesus at the Dance

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So, Jesus has returned. He’s living in your single adult ward and there’s a dance this Friday night. Tell me, girls and guys, do you attend the dance? If so, how does it make a difference that He’s there? Would you try to hang out with Him? How do you expect He would look/act? How would you look/act? On the other hand, if you’d give it a miss, why?

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Great Mormon Business Ideas, #1

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So…stay-at-home moms. Utah’s got lots of them. And I bet you’re a market demographic excitedly waiting to hear what I (an admittedly non-stay-at-home dad) am about to propose to bring joy, peace, time, and every other wonderful thing to your day. Well, wait no more, the first of the Great Mormon Business Ideas is here for you today! So far as I can tell, the three banes of the SAHM are: (1) laundry, (2) cleaning, and (3) taking care of kids. But none of these are really so bad on its own; it’s the fact that all three simultaneously demand attention that makes them a drag. So what I suggest is…<drum roll>…the Family Home Drudgery Sharing Program! Okay, so naming things isn’t one of my strong points. But wait! It’s still a great idea. Here’s how it works: four moms organize in a group. One is in charge of laundry, one is in charge of cleaning, and two are in charge of kids. The group picks a two- or three-hour block, say, 9:00 to 12:00. The two Kids moms split the kids between them during that time while the Laundry and Cleaning moms rotate from house to house taking care of…cleaning and laundry. So where’s the business idea part of this? Just helping people organize. Set up a website that helps moms find a group. I know I’m stereotyping the SAHM role (really, Dane? Laundry, kids, and cleaning? Is this…

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Resigning

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I started this semester as a seminary teacher. Two months in, I realized that it wasn’t going to work. I was tired and miserable, useless to my family, and unproductive at work. So, for the first time in my life, I asked to be released from a calling. No, that’s not quite accurate. I didn’t really ask; I informed them that I could manage for about two more weeks and then I’d be done. Now it’s been a week since I stopped teaching, and I have no doubt it was the right choice. The entire experience of teaching seminary was humbling. It’s a calling I had wanted — in fact, when we moved into this ward, the bishopric asked me what calling I’d like to serve in, and I told them that it’s always been my dream to teach seminary. (Contrary to popular belief, I’ve found that telling your leaders what calling you want to serve in is usually a good way to get that calling.) A long time ago my mom served as Relief Society president in her ward. After three or four years of service, she told me that she was going to ask to be released. My sister was a teenager, and my mom wanted to be able to be present in her life. At the time, I was a recently returned missionary who believed that every church calling represented the will of God in the most…

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